


head to wear the crown

by Disworl



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternia-typical mentions of violence, Alternian Society, Bechdel Test Pass, Class Issues, Ficlet, Gen, Hemospectrum, Peri-Sburb/Sgrub, Pesterlog 'fic, Second chapter is the quirkless/screenreader-friendly version
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:27:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27124505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Disworl/pseuds/Disworl
Summary: A brief conversation between rust and royalty.
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

astrictusGenealogy [AG] began trolling conceivableTermination [CT]

AG: HELLO MAULIE. I’M SU[R]P[R]ISED YOU HAVEN’T CHANGED YOU[R] HEMOTYPE TO YOU[R] ACTUAL CASTE.  
CT: wh^t does it m^tter now  
CT: ^lterni^ is de^d ^nd everyone ^lre^dy fucking knows  
CT: the c^t is outt^ the b^g re^dy to te^r up THR## FUCKING SW##PS of work  
CT: but if ms heiress w^nts it  
CT: there  
AG: I THINK YOU’[R]E JUMPING TO UNWA[RR]ENTED CONCLUSIONS.  
AG: I [R]EALIZE THIS SITUATION IS UNIDEAL FO[R] THE BOTH OF US, BUT THE[R]E’S LITTLE WE CAN DO ABOUT IT.  
AG: I T[R]ULY HOPE WE CAN FIND SOME SO[R]T OF AG[R]EEMENT.  
AG: COHESION WILL BE NECESSA[R]Y IF ALL OF US WANT TO SU[R]VIVE.  
CT: huh  
CT: COH#SION  
CT: h^ve just been w^iting ^ll your life spit out shit like th^t  
CT: you sure ^s hell didnt do it b^ck on ^lterni^  
AG: IT WASN’T NECESSA[R]Y THEN.  
CT: ^nd b^thing in your tiny slice of the empire sopor slime pie w^s  
CT: we might be pl^ying sgrub now but dont think th^t ^NY of us h^ve forgotten wh^t youve done before  
CT: th^ts ^ nice thing ^bout being openly rust now  
CT: i dont h^ve to kiss your ^ss ^nymore  
CT: so T#LL me  
CT: how m^ny heiresses h^d ol condy killed ^g^in  
AG: MAULIE.  
CT: i know th^t wh^t you did w^s h^lf just to prove to yourself your own ^bility  
CT: even if it w^s tre^ting rustbloods like freshly b^ked shit in new ^nd cre^tive w^ys  
AG: WELL, YOU’[R]E BEING AWFULLY P[R]ESUMPTOUS.  
CT: but wh^t did you R#^LLY think w^s gonn^ h^ppen when the time c^me  
CT: did you re^lly think you were th^t fucking speci^l  
CT: the heiress to unse^t the fish bitch by proving she could outcl^ss condys in me^ningless p^in c^used  
CT: if you did then youre worse th^n i thought  
AG: F[R]ANKLY, I DON’T [[NEED]] TO BE HAVING THIS CONVE[R]SATION.  
AG: I WAS ME[R]ELY T[R]YING TO BE DIPLOMATIC.  
CT: ^nd if you ^ctu^lly thought THIS w^s diplom^tic  
CT: then youre ^LSO more up your own ^ss th^n i thought  
CT: if the condesce h^d strung you up ^fter you ch^llenged her  
CT: i wouldnt even h^ve felt vindic^ted  
CT: you know why  
AG: I’D [[LOVE]] TO HEA[R] THE [[UTTE[R]LY]] UNP[R]ECEDENTED THOUGHTS A [R]USTBLOOD HAS ON THE HEMOSPECT[R]UM.  
CT: bec^use every heiress loves to stomp ^round ^nd m^ke some big show  
CT: prove theyre hot shit on the b^cks of rustbloods  
CT: but every single one of us knows th^t theyll just end up dying  
CT: for ^ll their efforts they might ^s well h^ve v^nished into the ^ir  
CT: we might ^s well be indulging ^ f^irybull lusus  
CT: you were never re^lly ^ thre^t  
CT: not like you w^nted to be  
CT: were both ^lmost lucky ^lterni^ is just ^ memory now ^nyw^y  
CT: even if you dont w^nt to ^dmit it  
AG: I HONESTLY HAVEN’T THE SLIGHTEST IDEA WHE[R]E YOU’[R]E GETTING THIS NOTION.  
CT: but youre ^ll ^lone now  
CT: forced to rely on trolls below you  
CT: there might be other bluebloods here but thing is youre ^ shitblood up until youre not  
CT: theres more difference between olive ^nd cerule^n th^n olive ^nd me  
CT: condys gone but now you h^ve to fin^lly be nice  
CT: so i guess i get why youve been trying to pl^y le^der  
CT: but this isnt ^lterni^ no m^tter how much you w^nt it to be  
CT: which just m^kes it re^lly p^thetic  
CT: now fuck off  



	2. Quirkless Version

astrictusGenealogy [AG] began trolling conceivableTermination [CT]

AG: HELLO MAULIE. I’M SURPRISED YOU HAVEN’T CHANGED YOUR HEMOTYPE TO YOUR ACTUAL CASTE.  
CT: what does it matter now  
CT: alternia is dead and everyone already fucking knows  
CT: the cat is outta the bag ready to tear up THREE FUCKING SWEEPS of work  
CT: but if ms heiress wants it  
CT: there  
AG: I THINK YOU’RE JUMPING TO UNWARRENTED CONCLUSIONS.  
AG: I REALIZE THIS SITUATION IS UNIDEAL FOR THE BOTH OF US, BUT THERE’S LITTLE WE CAN DO ABOUT IT.  
AG: I TRULY HOPE WE CAN FIND SOME SORT OF AGREEMENT.  
AG: COHESION WILL BE NECESSARY IF ALL OF US WANT TO SURVIVE.  
CT: huh  
CT: COHESION  
CT: have just been waiting all your life spit out shit like that  
CT: you sure as hell didnt do it back on alternia  
AG: IT WASN’T NECESSARY THEN.  
CT: and bathing in your tiny slice of the empire sopor slime pie was  
CT: we might be playing sgrub now but dont think that ANY of us have forgotten what youve done before  
CT: thats a nice thing about being openly rust now  
CT: i dont have to kiss your ass anymore  
CT: so TELL me  
CT: how many heiresses had ol condy killed again  
AG: MAULIE.  
CT: i know that what you did was half just to prove to yourself your own ability  
CT: even if it was treating rustbloods like freshly baked shit in new and creative ways  
AG: WELL, YOU’RE BEING AWFULLY PRESUMPTOUS.  
CT: but what did you REALLY think was gonna happen when the time came  
CT: did you really think you were that fucking special  
CT: the heiress to unseat the fish bitch by proving she could outclass condys in meaningless pain caused  
CT: if you did then youre worse than i thought  
AG: FRANKLY, I DON’T [[NEED]] TO BE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION.  
AG: I WAS MERELY TRYING TO BE DIPLOMATIC.  
CT: and if you actually thought THIS was diplomatic  
CT: then youre ALSO more up your own ass than i thought  
CT: if the condesce had strung you up after you challenged her  
CT: i wouldnt even have felt vindicated  
CT: you know why  
AG: I’D [[LOVE]] TO HEAR THE [[UTTERLY]] UNPRECEDENTED THOUGHTS A RUSTBLOOD HAS ON THE HEMOSPECTRUM.  
CT: because every heiress loves to stomp around and make some big show  
CT: prove theyre hot shit on the backs of rustbloods  
CT: but every single one of us knows that theyll just end up dying  
CT: for all their efforts they might as well have vanished into the air  
CT: we might as well be indulging a fairybull lusus  
CT: you were never really a threat  
CT: not like you wanted to be  
CT: were both almost lucky alternia is just a memory now anyway  
CT: even if you dont want to admit it  
AG: I HONESTLY HAVEN’T THE SLIGHTEST IDEA WHERE YOU’RE GETTING THIS NOTION.  
CT: but youre all alone now  
CT: forced to rely on trolls below you  
CT: there might be other bluebloods here but thing is youre a shitblood up until youre not  
CT: theres more difference between olive and cerulean than olive and me  
CT: condys gone but now you have to finally be nice  
CT: so i guess i get why youve been trying to play leader  
CT: but this isnt alternia no matter how much you want it to be  
CT: which just makes it really pathetic  
CT: now fuck off  



End file.
